It’s maybe a cliché, but talking and listening is important. Everyone has different boundaries. How do you deal with this in a proper way as an escort lady? Showing your boundaries can be done both physically and by talking. Physical approval can be shown by a simple touch, kissing enthusiastically, hugging, or to snuggle up against someone. A physical cue you if you not approve, is not reacting to hints. For example, if a man slides his hands through your bottom, while you clearly don’t want to perform anal sex, you can subtly guide his hands in another direction. When he tries to do it again, then tell him in friendly manner that you don’t want to do that. If a client doesn’t understand this cue either, then you may (verbally!) make it more clear to him. If even this last verbal cue hasn’t been sufficient to him, the rule states that you may leave. At Pink Sheets we apply the three-stage rule. One time friendly, one time very clear, and the last time you apply consequences to the warning, that is leaving.
The work has to be pleasant, safe, and painless. If you don’t find something pleasant, because something is hurting, express this immediately. Does he pull your hair a bit too strong during the date? By gently saying to be more careful with you is often enough.
Obviously, you shouldn’t let it come this far with everything. For example, if Don Juan has booked you who has an absurdly large penis size. Everybody has their preference, but a too large penis can be problematic. If by the eager sight of his ammunition you already judge that the barrel is too narrow, then you have every right to indicate that it is not possible to perform penetration. Despite the need of a fitting condom to have safe sex, it has to be painless as well.
It’s still likely you may cross your boundaries once. For example, with your regular client that invites you monthly. The client wants to have anal sex with you. You indicate that you’re not willing. Though, he continues to book you and a certain familiarity arises. You don’t want to lose the client, you want to please him, and (partly) respond to his wishes. But give him an inch and before you know… You will be the one with the feeling that you’ve crossed your boundaries. So, dare to say NO!
If you say NO to something you don’t want, or at that moment can’t perform, it means you say YES to something that is important to you or something you cherish to have. Your self-respect, your boundaries.